The hotMaMa Diaries

The hotMaMa Diaries

Everyone has a different experience of parenting and motherhood and there is no right or wrong path along this crazy journey. The hotMaMa diaries is a place to read stories from other mothers and even share your own!

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  1. BLOG-TITLE-11-Lessons-ALL-2“I am proud of many things in life, but nothing beats being a mother.”
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    1. You don’t care about being naked, seriously! Before I had E, I used to have an anxiety attack before each and every PAP appointment. I actually had an “after school special” at work deciding on whether I should get a Brazilian for birth, such trivial things but those were my absolute concerns, now HA, the number of times I’ve had to strip down during the pregnancy/birth process, I could care less!
    1. No one and I mean NO ONE’S OPINION MATTERS. This is something you will learn once you’re visibly pregnant. The amount of “out of left field” advice I got was mind-boggling. I remember being told everything from my clothes were too tight to I’m starving myself because I’m vain.

    What many people didn’t know is, I was sick the entire 41 weeks of my pregnancy. So I only gained about 5 pounds (my mother had the same kind of pregnancy), so people were always commenting that I wasn’t eating or I was starving my baby to be skinny, when it was the total opposite, I was eating like crazy, but nothing would stay down (if you can imagine I was actually sick while making a left turn at a busy intersection, FML). Just like the unsolicited advice I got while pregnant it only snowballed after birth. What I didn’t realize back then is sometimes it’s better just to smile and nod than to fight the advice.

    Everyone is going to have an opinion on how you should raise your child and what you should be doing, DO YOU! You know your baby the best, and you’ll have to deal with the repercussions of the advice so only do what makes you feel comfortable.

    1. Breastfeeding isn’t easy for everyone. I’ve had people shame me (to my face) for not breastfeeding my daughter, and all I’ve got to say is, do what works for you and your family. I believe that FED IS BEST.
    1. Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. I used to say I’ll never co-sleep. My baby will be in her crib from day one. Well, it wasn’t until she was 4.5 months that we started sleep training her, so before that, she was in our bed, every night, sleeping on top of me. So go with the flow and never say never. Diverse-group-of-ten-babies-playing-157429705_13946x3585
    2. Do not compare your pregnancy or your child to anyone else. No two pregnancies (even from the same mother) are the same so how can you expect your baby to develop the same as another? Trust me, all you’re going to do is set yourself up for disappointment. Enjoy your baby’s milestones, they’re their own perfect human and should never be compared

    3. Sleep when the baby sleeps is shit advice. I’m sorry. If I slept when E slept, nothing would get done.

    4. Mom groups are a godsend. My #octoberpumpkins are the reason I’m still sane. We have meet ups and subgroups; they’re always there when I need them, and a couple of them live close by, so maternity leave hasn’t been too lonely.

    5. You’re stronger (mentality and physically) than you think. I’ve never gone on 3 hours of sleep and still functioned enough to clean the entire house and host a dinner party, but this mom is tougher than she used to be!

    6. Make sure you’re looking after yourself. I always use this example; you know how on a plane they say put your mask on first and then help your family? Makes sense right? If you’re not okay how will you look after your little miracle? Obviously, baby’s needs are important but make sure you’re looked after as well.

    7. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. While you are tougher than ever, sometimes you’ll need some help, and you shouldn’t be ashamed to ask family or a close friend.

    8. You’re doing great! I know sometimes it may seem like you’re failing, but baby doesn’t know. Don’t sweat the small things – you’re trying, and that’s all that matters.

     

    DEE HAIDER is a mother, blogger and wannabe farm girl living in a suburban city in Ontario, Canada. While on maternity leave her days are filled chasing her extremely loud daughter and two cats that have an insane amount of personality. She blogs to keep herself somewhat sane, writing about her personal style, life as a busy mum, and interior design. Check out her fun-loving and honest lifestyle blog at theHaiderHouse or find her on InstagramTwitter, and Facebook. 

  2. JulyI am still breastfeeding my daughter well into toddlerhood and the experience has been so rewarding watching my child thrive and grow.

     

    I always knew I wanted to breastfeed even before falling pregnant. While I was pregnant the thought did seem daunting to me. I came from a small family and was the first of my cousins to fall pregnant, and the first in my friendship circle too. I had not really seen anyone breastfeed their baby in front of me. 

     

    Although breastfeeding is natural, it doesn't always come easily and is a learned art. Like any new skill, you will get better with practice.

     

    Here are my 6 tips for success:

     

    1. Get educated BEFORE the baby arrives

    I can't stress this enough. Let me tell you when that baby comes you won't have time to shower let alone read up on breastfeeding. Most babies breastfeed within an hour of being born, so it pays to learn what to do well before your baby is due. Please guys if you do any online research, make sure you are seeking good quality information from reliable sources. I would recommend reading some good books instead though. Learn about all the amazing benefits of breastfeeding, and all the facts and myths. Mentally preparing yourself is so important. 

     

    2. Sign up to a breastfeeding course

    During your second trimester you may attend a breastfeeding course. The NHS and breastfeeding support groups such as La Leche League UK offer some amazing courses.  Run by a qualified educator they will cover important content like: the first feed, skin-to-skin contact, positioning, attachment, milk supply, partner roles and common concerns. They will allow plenty of time for questions and will give you information to take home with you.

     

    3. Stock up on the necessities

    Look, lets me real here, you don’t really need anything to breastfeed other than a comfortable chair. But if you want to be super prepared here is a list of some items which you may want to purchase: a few nursing tops (or button ups) that are easy to pull down, a few good supportive nursing bras, nursing pads, cream for sore nipples and frozen gel packs. Some mums also find it helpful to have a rocker, a sling, a pump, breast milk storage bottles or bags, or a nursing pillow, but you can do fine without these.

     

    4. Be educated about how labour can affect breastfeeding

    You can improve your odds for successful breastfeeding if you can reduce or limit interventions during labour. Attend the labour course run by your hospital to get more information and ask plenty of questions.

     

    5. Know your body

    Check to see whether you have inverted nipples. Do not worry if you have inverted nipples, just know that there are devices which you may need to use to help you.

     

    6. Breastfeed your baby as soon as possible after you deliver.

    Babies who are breastfed within the first hour generally have more successful breastfeeding experiences than those who aren’t. Give plenty of skin-to-skin contact with your baby.

    July2

    Nina Belle (aka Judgy Mummy), is a 30-year-old Australian blogger, wife and mother. A breastfeeding advocate, Nina is successfully breastfeeding her 20-month-old daughter. Passionate about breastfeeding she aims to inspire and encourage other women to breastfeed their children well into toddlerhood. Nina also writes about pregnancy, baby topics, parenting and fun DIY activities. Her blog is www.judgymummy.com